ifitbeyourwill Podcast
“ifitbeyourwill" Podcasts is on a mission to talk to amazing indie artists from around the world! Join us for cozy, conversational episodes where you'll hear from talented and charismatic singer-songwriters, bands from all walks of life talk about their musical process & journey. Let's celebrate being music lovers!
Season 5 has begun!
Please subscribe ❤️
https://ifitbeyourwill.buzzsprout.com/2119718/follow
my email: ifthisbeyourwill@gmail.ca
http://www.ifitbeyourwill.ca
www.instagram.com/colleycdog
ifitbeyourwill Podcast
ifitbeyourwill S05 E05 • Carolina Chauffe of hemlock
Carolina Chauffe, performing as Hemlock, has spent the past year and three months as a musical nomad, never staying in one place for more than two weeks. Transmitting from Chicago between tour stops, she describes this lifestyle as a delicate balance of the "miraculous and exhausting" — finding empowerment and community connection while sacrificing stability and proximity to loved ones.
Chauffe's musical journey began in competitive choirs, gradually transitioning from the safety of collective performance to the vulnerability of solo artistry. This evolution reflects her approach to creativity: embracing vulnerability while remaining connected to community. Most fascinating is her "Song of Day" project, now in its sixth year, where she writes and records one song daily for an entire month annually. This practice has generated hundreds of compositions and fundamentally transformed her relationship with songwriting. "The more songs that I write, the more kinds of songs I feel comfortable writing," she explains, describing how the project expanded her creative boundaries across genres, narration styles, and instrumentation.
Her latest album 444, released in October 2024, showcases twelve selections from these Song of Day collections, reimagined with a full band of Chicago musicians. The album deliberately spans all six years of the project, opening with "Day One" to honor where it all began. With touring planned through August and several recording projects in development, Schaaf exemplifies artistic dedication in its purest form. Her practice of observing both "the miraculous and the mundane" transforms everyday experiences into universally relatable songs, creating what she beautifully describes as "golden strings that defy geographical proximity and linear time." Don't miss the chance to experience Hemlock live — follow her journey, attend a show, and discover the power of daily creative practice.
And all right, cool. Welcome back to another episode of If it Be your Will podcast. As season five carries on, we can start to feel spring a little bit, not much, but enough to keep us focused on the sun and the summer. We need it. God, what a winter. Today I have Hemlock, Carolina Chauffe from Hemlock, and Caroline, where are you coming in from?
hemlock:Well, today I'm transmitting to you from Chicago, where we're also hanging on to the dregs of winter. It's snowing out here. I guess the groundhog was right, but I've been on tour for about a year and three months now. I moved away from Chicago in November of 2023. And I haven't been anywhere for more than two weeks since then. So just deep in the road is the truer answer, I guess, to that question. But today, the truer answer I guess to that question.
colleyc:But today, Chicago, Chicago it is. And is this a short stop before you pack your bags and head to the next destination?
hemlock:Yeah, the bags have stayed packed. I'm playing an album release show of my friends in a band called Tobacco City it's a rare moment of the full band reunion and and we'll be playing together before I set off back down south.
colleyc:Great and like, just as a question like what is it like being on the road for so long? Like I guess let me ask you two parts to this what are the good things and what are the not so good things of of such a long time? That's a heck of a tour you've been on there, carolina.
hemlock:Right? Well, you know each of those questions have very long answers, but to try to be as succinct as possible, it is miraculous and exhausting.
colleyc:Good, nice words.
hemlock:Some days it's more the former, some days it's more the latter, some days it's more the former, some days it's more the latter.
hemlock:I think the good things about it are a sense of empowerment and a sense of also connection to community and like a kind of renewal, a constant renewal of hope, which we can all use. You know, it's necessary for our survival, individually and collectively, in this moment. Um, and the the harder things about it are just um, it involves a lot of uh, sacrifice, of um, of a consistent home, of, like a proximity to the people that you care about on a regular basis. Um, it is uh, uh, you know, like it's my passion, but it's also a job that you're kind of always clocked in for. I'm spending way more time than I would like to in the car. You know I'm driving more than I'm playing music. Even so, that's like a major sacrifice. But yeah, at the end of the day, I do feel a great sense of fulfillment from touring and, more than even playing the music, I think it's that sense of collective hope that keeps the wheels turning absolutely, absolutely.
colleyc:And I think, too, your music in particular throws out that you know, take a breath, things are okay, even though I drove 12 hours and played one hour, and I'll do the thing again tomorrow and tomorrow. It's those small little moments that really um define us and and add to or take away from the happiness that we have. Um, interesting, interesting, so tell let's. Let's kind of rewind time a little bit and like where did it begin for you? Where did music start to really become the forefront of what you were going to do?
hemlock:Genesis. I, um, I was always a choir kid, um, I was in competitive choirs in middle school and high school and college, so it was uh like melody and collective, you know, group voice. Harmony has always been something that's really been inspiring to me and has informed my songwriting in a big way. But I got, um the guitar that I still play out on tour right now, an old, uh knockoff martin, is, um, it came into my life when I was 15 from craigslist and um totally uh opened up a bunch of windows, uh and doors for for my creative output and um, I was in a band in high school and uh, early college that would tour between louisiana and texas because I'm from southern louisiana and um, I met a band called Little Mazarn doing that and then they asked me to tour with them and their band and I'm still in that band.
hemlock:But that was the first time that I ever was on the road for a prolonged amount of time and we actually went up to Canada to play a festival called River and Sky that I've been to a couple of times now, um, or a few times, um, and uh, I just fell in love.
hemlock:I fell in love with the road. It was nice to see that there could be like such a, you know, kindred sense of community in so many different cities and states and and and countries and um, this kind of like shared ethos that's totally, you know, decentralized but very tightly woven, um, these like golden strings that are defy um, defy geographical proximity and and defy, uh, linear time and um, I uh that it, I mean it. Really there's like a sense of both internal and external validation. Yeah, with touring and being on the road and sharing your music and um, it's, it's just rewarding. But, you know, the more you meet friends too and peers in that environment who also are making some of the most incredible music you've ever heard, it's like the more that that inspires you to continue with your practice. At least that's how it's been for me.
colleyc:So it's just and like do you remember some of your first songs that you wrote? Like I asked this because you're such a prolific writer and like we'll get into the song of the day, because I think that that in itself is pretty impressive. But like did you always? Were you always penning? Were you always like, since you got that guitar? Like was it to so that you could write your own songs? Is that was one of the objectives of it?
hemlock:yeah, well, I've I always liked you know, I've been an avid journaler and I loved poetry.
hemlock:I loved writing prose, um in grade school, and um music, since I was singing so much it felt like an obvious, you know, combination to, to, to throw the two together in the same bowl and see what, what would come of it and um, yeah, so I've, I've, I've been writing. I think the original songs I had were probably when I was 13 and um different showcases, uh, at my school, when I was around 14 or 15, and um in Louisiana, there's, you know, a lot of young musicians, and so you could be in a bar, like at an open mic, when you, before you, were of age to drink, and so that was like I was able to be exposed to a larger music community, which was something I was very grateful for as a teenager. And so, yeah, I can remember, you know, the little dinky songs, like some of the first songs I ever wrote. I can remember the choruses of songs that may never see the light of day from when I was very, very much in my adolescence. But, yeah, they stick around, they linger.
hemlock:And yeah, thank you for your compliments too, on the Song of Day collection. I definitely am.
colleyc:Yeah.
hemlock:There's always more, you know, there's just always lyrics.
colleyc:Or lyrics.
hemlock:Rolling around in my head.
colleyc:Absolutely.
Speaker 3:Absolutely.
colleyc:I'm interested too in asking that you talked about being in a choir. In a choir, I mean, you're one amongst many.
hemlock:Yes.
colleyc:It's a totally different story when it's you, your guitar, on stage in front of everybody else and everybody staring at you and you're pouring your heart out. Here's my journals. Who wants to read that? It's like you cannot get any more raw and, you know, volatile in a way. How did you come to that Like? Did that take time for you to to to get the courage or the confidence to, for all those eyes and and and you know, I mean, I guess, criticism too, because when you're putting yourself out there, it's, it's going to come. How did you get, how did how did that happen for you Finding that way that you could, you could be that front person on the stage?
hemlock:yeah, well, I feel like you know, starting my performance journey in choirs was a great way to ease into standing before a room, because when you are singing choir, you often have, you know, the dozens of other people singing with you, and so that was like a you know tiptoeing, put just dipping your toes into the water performance where you have this, this like network of people who are all singing the same piece as you, and so it doesn't feel like all you know the pressure is is lower because not all the eyes are on you right um, and so then, like just paring down from being in a larger choir to being in a chamber choir, to being in a band where there were four of us, you know, that like kind of was a way to wean into the attention being more and more concentrated on, like me and my voice specifically, until I was pretty comfortable doing solo performance way to kind of cut my teeth, uh, with, you know, being in front of removed people, because often most of the audience are other songwriters that are there to share their work as well, and so there's like a um and again like a community aspect to it.
hemlock:That's like shared ethos, this shared motivation, and yeah, I it's. It's interesting to think about the answer to this question, because now I I very rarely feel nervous at all to be be to be in a state of performance or to be public facing with song.
hemlock:It's much harder for me to do something like this, like a podcast, where I'm, you know, way more prone to putting my my foot in my mouth, just thinking on the spot that I am reciting something that is, you know, a finished work that I that I know by heart.
colleyc:Right, right right.
hemlock:Yeah.
colleyc:Now with your catalog. I mean it's really, it's really beautiful. I mean you write such great songs and so many of them. When do you know when a song is? You know, like, where it has something that's worth Further exploration, or vocals or whatever. Whatever, like, how do you come to that?
hemlock:um, okay, I'm on to something here yeah, well, I think like a big part of my practice at least, is being forgiving with yourself to um, to work with the first thought that comes to mind, at least with the song a day collection that's. That's kind of the premise behind those songs is is being able to follow an idea to its completion, um, even if it's not something that you're in love with. So, even if I don't feel like I'm, you know, like on to something with a specific melody or specific, like the first thing that I sit down and play on my guitar, I'll like try to follow that through and just give it, you know, like honor that first idea and and and treat it with respect and um, see what happens. Because what I've discovered in releasing those song of day projects is just that, you know, even if there's a few songs on each of those collections that I really am like I'm fine to never play that song again.
hemlock:It was in the moment. There's always someone that song. It just shows how, um, a beautiful thing to learn is that, even if you'll probably find someone's ears that with it and feel, um, you know, like there's it's kind of a there's no bad ideas kind of approach to it where, um, you know, there are definitely songs that I that I prefer to other songs that I've written, and sometimes there's like a feeling of like, okay, yes, this is one that I'm going to revere and that I'm going to come back to and that will be a regular part of my set for a very long time. But there, I think there's really something to the catharsis of just getting an idea out of your system, even if it's one that's far from you know your batch of favorites or something.
Speaker 3:Red winged blackbird by the lake.
colleyc:It is strange to be, but today and what was your process like for that song a day? Like I was looking at your at the band camp page and I mean first, can you describe that to us? Like, what was your, what was your point, what did you want to do with with this song a day?
hemlock:Yeah. So when, in 2019, um, in February I embarked on this project of writing one song a day and recording it on my phone that day, each day, for the month of February, um, and at the end of that month, I felt so like, um you know both proud of and um inspired by that practice, like it felt like it pushed me, um, in all the right ways and challenged me and in a way that was really productive for for me and my songwriting practice, that, um, it felt like doing that for one month out of each year was a sustainable benchmark of trying to keep that project going as a long-form thing. So we're, you know it's 2025. So we're now six years deep into this saga where, just one month out of each year, I do another one, where it's again writing one song a day for each day of that month and recording them on my phone by the end of that day.
colleyc:Yeah, yeah, it's been it's been pressure no like well.
hemlock:it's not, though I think I function. Maybe it's that I function well under a deadline. It's like something that holds you accountable and that's something about, you know, my, my practice both hands on songwriting, often being solitary is there has to be some kind of to keep me responsible to my practice, to keep me, you know, on tour. That's like booking my own dates and making sure the ball is rolling, but with songwriting it's often there are streaks where I can go, you know, like a month or two without touching the guitar, and I think song a day is something I look forward to because it's like, oh, when I sit down to play, like there's always something that comes out, you know.
hemlock:so it's it's I look, I look forward to, kind of the binge, binge, like a songwriting that happens for that period of time, and it gets easier every time as well like I think the more I do it, the more my boundaries are expanded of what a song is, of what genres I like to work with, of like playing instruments that I don't know how to play, of switching around narration. You know, it's like the more songs that I write, the the more kinds of songs I feel comfortable writing or playing with. It's playful.
colleyc:That's the pressure's off, because it's just an act of play.
Speaker 3:Right.
colleyc:And like just looking at your first one, so you put it on March 1st 2019. And this was day one, day two, day three. You know the titles of your songs. Were those done in order or did you play around with that? Were those done in order or did?
hemlock:you play around with that? No, I didn't. Yeah, they each go with their corresponding date. So day one is February 1st, day two is February 2nd, and so on, and that's been the case for all of the Song of Days since then. My friend Rand actually texted me the other day and he was like I just realized that after the 12 years are done, you will have written a song for everyone's birthday who exists.
colleyc:There you go. That is very true, and do you have a process for this, specifically Because you do have a certain timeline, time crunch, as you said? What's your process? When you approach, okay, day starts, you know we're midway through the month you're on song 15. Like what would your typical process be in getting ready for you know this day? 16 example?
hemlock:Yeah it. It honestly, you know, typically is a practice in sleep deprivation too, because often, when I'm able to carve out, time is at the end of the night, like right before down, you know, and you're going to sleep and you've been conscious for however many hours, and it's always I've always found it easier to stay up late than to wake up early, and so it'll often be, you know, reflecting on a day's experience and warmed up hands and chipping away, chipping off a couple of hours of sleep for the night. And but there's like I think there's something to be said to about the kind of unconscious or even subconscious process of how my observations moving through the world change in that month, because you're kind of like, you know, you're porous, you're like taking in all this information and you're you have to be very honed into the kind of wonders of everyday life in order to even have something to say. Sometimes, right, you know where it's like.
hemlock:What was the like most beautiful thing that I saw this day, or what emotions am I processing? You just have to be an active observer of your environment, at least if you're writing autobiographically which sometimes also, though, I mean, you can see something and then create a narrative and write a fictional song as well, you know, from doing that same thing. So the process is, I guess, immersive in that way, of just this kind of keen observation of your environment, which is something that I try to carry through my day to day life, um, just to observe the, the miraculous and the mundane, you know for sure, for sure.
colleyc:And was this ongoing when you were on tour as well, or do you? Are you settled for a month during that? You know, recording month of of?
hemlock:Yeah, I typically try to choose a month in the year where I've got the least amount of motion going on, you know. So I don't know yet. This year, 2025, what, what month I'm going to choose? All I know is that it can't be doubling up on any of the six that I've already done.
colleyc:So that narrows it down Six months left, right, exactly.
hemlock:So I've got to try to, you know, hone my, my calendar into where I've. I've, um, I'll hopefully be mostly in one place for whatever month that I choose for this year. Um, but I've definitely had times where I've been on or touring during song a day, like last, last year's, the November project for 2024. Um, I was in new Orleans for a week out of that and I was in Atlanta for a week after that and then I was, I mean, you know it, it, it bops around, but I try to have relative stillness for that month.
colleyc:Nice and, as you were saying, your environment, the community that you're in during that time, will play an influence on what you end up putting down on your iPhone. Sure, that's really cool.
hemlock:Yeah, that's really cool. I think, um, you know, life has has been an important part of the practice because there are different like kind of sound textures and emotional textures and um, uh, you know, like kind of like ethno-musical, logical, like different, different people, different peers in each space, in each city that you're moving through, and then if you allow those to be your direct influences or direct inspirations for what you're writing at that time, then you end up with a lot of like very subtly different styles of songwriting or of lyricism.
colleyc:And yeah, like I said, I think it's better to be a sponge like the more you can take in, the more you can put out theoretically know I always thought that was the most beautiful thing about a songwriter is they scan your world and communicate your thoughts that you know don't come as natural as you know others would, but you have that ability to like, paint this beautiful canvas of sound that they can relate to. You know that they're themselves in.
hemlock:Yeah, synthesizing a specific experience and then spitting it out in a way that it's universally relatable, yeah, it's, it is a, it is a. I mean that's like a miracle in and of itself.
colleyc:It is, isn't it, isn't it? That's the great thing about music. I find it's just that universality and the commonality and it's just something that we all share, regardless of where we're from or how we grew up or with who.
colleyc:It's that one connection that we can all which makes these kinds of podcasts so fun, because it's such an easy thing to talk about Somebody that's passionate like myself and musicians like yourself. It's just, it's such an easy thing to talk about with somebody that's passionate like myself and musicians like yourself. It's just, it's a match made in heaven. I'll say, um, so, carolyn, tell me a little bit about 444. So, from what I read and please correct me but this was kind of an assembly of some songs from the song a day, some other track singles that you had. Can you kind of an assembly of some songs from the song a day, some other tracks, singles that you had? Can you kind of paint the picture of how this record came to be?
hemlock:Sure, so 444, we self-released because I function as an entirely independent musician, so we self-released that last October, october 2024. And so we self-released that last October, october 2024. And it is, I guess the elevator pitch, you know, is that it's the best stuff so far of the Song of Day songs. So all 12 songs on the album are from the Song of Day practice and they include, they span, the entire collection. So there's at least, you know, one song from each of the Song of Day months so far included in that kind of compilation album.
hemlock:That was totally kind of like souped up, you know, and reimagined with a band of some of my dearest friends here in Chicago Bailey Bailey, misenberger, andy PK and Jack Henry, who are fantastic musicians, just so intuitive and so enthusiastic, and I'm blown away by them consistently. And, yeah, we all kind of chose the songs together, you know, sifting through the hundreds that are there and all kind of picked ones that felt particularly exciting to us or, you know, like thematically important to the narrative arc of what we were trying to say with the album, like paying respects to the song a day as a, as an entirety, um, which is why the opening track is day one.
hemlock:You know that hearkens to the very first song, a day song that there ever was Um.
colleyc:it sparked it all.
hemlock:Yes, exactly, yeah. So that's the true Genesis, you know, the true like uh, opening moment, yeah, moment, yeah, I I feel really proud of it. I feel really um, honored by the collaboration too of the four of us and um and what everybody brought to the table to kind of make it the most dynamically, um, diverse and also like kind of genre pushing album that we've put out so far. But they are, yeah, they're all song of day songs and I believe that you know we'll be recording again in apr, april, and I'm looking forward to that. But I think I think we're going to continue on with this kind of like paying more respects to some of these song of day songs that otherwise get kind of buried in the mass of. You know, it's like pretty extensive body of work.
colleyc:So, absolutely, absolutely. That's so cool, so kind of to bring things to a close here. Thanks again for joining me. Like great stories, I love your process of how you brought this to be, and this record, too, is just so good. What is?
hemlock:2025. Hold, I'm assuming you're back on the road touring, and is there more music coming in 2025 that you can share with us? Sure, I, um, you know I I'll keep on. I'm a lifer, you know I'll always be chipping away at the old. There will always be. Um, there's another song for those you know respective months, whenever they present. I'll be touring through the month of august this year. I blew straight by the time. I uh hopefully find another bedroom again, um, but um, just the wheels keep on turning. There will always be more, but there's an EP I'm looking forward to putting out that was recorded with another friend. There's a solitary album of demos that I recorded in a best friend's backyard in Texas, of solo demos. There's all these things that I'm sitting on and there's a lot of eggs in the nest and we'll let them all hatch in there when it's their turn well, let them come as they come.
colleyc:You know you got to nurture them and keep them warm and yeah positive nature around them absolutely well. It's been a real pleasure. Again, thanks so much, and um, I really look forward to hearing some of the new stuff and but I'm still enjoying 444 great record. People go get it. Catch hemlock on tour as well, because we know she'll be out there somewhere you gotta find her.
hemlock:Throw a guard at the map right there you go get a t-shirt buy a record, go see a show, support these artists.
colleyc:So so thanks again, caroline, it was great.
hemlock:Yeah, my pleasure.
Speaker 3:Thank you. Maybe I'm just built to drive and drive and drive to a new city every day and sleep in someone's guest bed every night. People are so generous, it's true, people are kind. I can count on change cause and see it's malleable dependency and I will go to therapy again this Monday evening, talk about how hard it is to strike some balance in this life, and I will leave feeling the same way I felt, walking in, maybe with some burden lifted, maybe with some burden bear, and I will do the dishes that I've been to do this morning and I'll brush my teeth and go to bed and try again and try again, and try again, and try again, and try again, and try again, and try again, and try again, and try again and try.
