ifitbeyourwill Podcast
“ifitbeyourwill" Podcasts is on a mission to talk to amazing indie artists from around the world! Join us for cozy, conversational episodes where you'll hear from talented and charismatic singer-songwriters, bands from all walks of life talk about their musical journey. Let's celebrate being music lovers!
Season Four runs from September 2024 to December 2024
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ifitbeyourwill Podcast
ifitbeyourwill S04E21 • Matthew Thomas Dillon of Windmill
What drives an artist from secretive teenage recordings to captivating live performances and recording contracts? Join us as we embark on a journey with Matthew Thomas Dillon, the creative mind behind Windmill, whose musical evolution has been nothing short of transformative. Matthew shares his story about moving from quiet four-track sessions to the spotlight. Through a conversation rich with Matthew's personal insights, discover how an unexpected love for pop music shaped his songwriting.
Unveiling the whirlwind of emotions behind releasing a debut album, we navigate Matthew's reflections on the unexpected praise and the introspective process of music creation. The stories behind tracks like "Tokyo Moon," "Replace Me," and "Boarding Lounges" reveal their deeper significance, serving as reminders of ambition and new beginnings. This chapter captures the delicate balance between personal detachment and artistic expression, where Matthew's blend of poetry and subconscious creativity turns his music into intimate memories or snapshots of life, rather than mere songs.
In a heartfelt exploration of artistic fulfillment, Matthew shares how the purchase of an acoustic piano reignited his passion for music creation. He discusses integrating classical piano into his work, leading to a unique approach of releasing multiple versions of tracks on Bandcamp. Additionally, his innovative vocal techniques highlight the importance of authenticity and genuine emotion, painting a vivid picture of an artist dedicated to capturing raw, unique qualities in music. Tune in to experience Matthew's journey through the struggles and triumphs of a music career, leaving listeners inspired by the power of personal expression.
here we are, if we, if it be your will well, podcasts were, you know, blazing through season four here and today again reaching across the pond. It's been these nice little voyages. I'm heading over to the UK. Here I have Matthew Dillon, Thomas Dillon from Windmill. Windmill Amazing piano driven indie pop, alternative, sometimes heartbreaking lyrics over top of playful, imaginative songs, and today we're going to kind of break into that and learn all about Matthew and his music. So thanks, Matthew, for hopping on.
Speaker 3:Thanks for having me. You made. You made me sound good.
Speaker 1:Well, I need to listen to this guy. He sounds good.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 3:Right up my street.
Speaker 2:Windmill's been around for a long time and you're the. You're it, you're windmill. Um, you've been making music for for quite a while. I mean I found your first and tell me if I'm wrong here your first album 2007.
Speaker 3:I mean it's probably, yeah, prior to that but that was your first kind of like introduction to windmill, introducing windmill to the world yeah, I've been, um, yeah, recording like since I was sort of about 16 years old, just on a four track and stuff like that, but like I wouldn't let anyone hear it, either that, or no one was interested in hearing it, like it was not from a creative background or anything like that.
Speaker 3:So like it was quite. It was like my secret shame, my humiliation to kind of sit and make these songs. But then that kind of gave me sort of a freedom, you know, to do like weird stuff on them animal noises and crawling around on all fours, barking and stuff like that. So I was doing that for a long time and then I kind of just gave up because it was like you know, what future do I have? Like people like in the small town, I was from sort of expected you to be in an office by that point and stuff like that, and it was just like, oh God, I gonna do like I was totally lost.
Speaker 3:And then, um, a few years later, for some reason, I was just like you know I want to start making things again, like it was just for my own sanity or I just wanted to some sort of expression. And then even then I was, and that's when I wrote most of the songs that went on that album. Okay, but I was around.
Speaker 3:I think I was about 24 at this point, so it's sort of quite late and like never had I played live or anything like that so quite an unusual path and then, for some reason I don't know if it was outside encouragement or I don't know I just suddenly found the will to share it. But I like I made just a very small stack of demo CDs and and then, um, this is back in the my myspace era, so, like I had a few songs on myspace, like I basically had the puddle city racing lights, but all in demo form. Okay, um, so, yeah, they sounded quite different. But, um, yes, I made up these little, uh, demo cds. And then I just found this one guy, nick davis, and um, he, um, he ran like a student promotions company for indie labels, so he, he worked with like 4ad and excel and all these cool labels and he would, um, he would send out their new tracks to student unions and things like that and he would get feedback on the tracks and stuff like that.
Speaker 3:And I sent it to this guy like incredibly nervous because I just like no one had tracks and stuff like that. And I sent it to this guy like incredibly nervous because I just like no one had heard this stuff at all and I thought it was like it was just going to be completely ridiculed. And, um, I mean, I don't have that great a self-esteem as it is. So this was like my you know my big leap and um, yeah, he said he absolutely he loved it and um, and then he just kept pushing it and you us showcases, things like that. So people came and saw me play live and things like that.
Speaker 3:And then, yeah, I ended up getting like a seven inch with a label called Set it Caravan and then a company called In-House Press did the press release for it and the guy that owned In-House Press owned Melodic Records and he was like, actually, I really want to make a windmill album. So it kind of went from nothing to suddenly I was in this world like I dreamt about. Uh, it's kind of, yeah, it was amazing. Yeah, I couldn't believe it. But yeah, that's all over now.
Speaker 2:So not all over. I mean, you're still very um productive. It seems like if you go to your band camp page, there are a lot of um interesting releases and stuff that's just come out like just this year as well, so that activity is definitely there um I wanted to.
Speaker 2:To ask you, matt, though, is like what, when did you start writing music? Like, when did that that door open for you? When? Like what are your recollections of that, as you were starting off thinking maybe I'd like to write, and myself out there? Do you remember those earlier times where, where?
Speaker 3:yeah, yeah, I liked really terrible pop music, like it was like it's all I I don't know I've been exposed to.
Speaker 3:I hadn't heard indie music, alternative music, anything like that this is sort of like early, sort of mid-teens, so I'm at that stage now where I should be rebelling and listening to cool stuff. I remember I got like a cd, like a portable cd player, and the first album I got was like an eternal album which was like this girl band in the UK, like just awful, awful stuff. And so for a while, like I, I was begging for like a keyboard, because I suddenly, like I like the idea, I like the look of people sitting playing the piano, like it was cool, like I like that image, and so I just like on a whim, like I wanted this uh keyboard.
Speaker 3:So yeah, I started writing in your teens yeah, exactly like this is still in your yeah, exactly so I was writing these awful, awful kind of pop songs and then, um, a friend, um, a friend of mine, john tough, had the the eels single, nova cane for a soul, which I really like, that song. But it had this like other song like a b-side on it and I remember, like I don't know, it just opened this whole world to me. It was like I don't know, because this other music, like it's all I was exposed to, but it just didn't sit right with me. And then suddenly this, this ill single just really spoke to me, like it was felt a bit more dangerous, like it said fuck in it.
Speaker 3:And I was like this is great Rated. Yeah, exactly it was different.
Speaker 3:And it just felt like it only existed to convey a message, like it was like you know the guy from Eels. It wasn't like it wasn't pandering to anything and it just had great lyrics, like things expressed in a way that you'd never heard before, and it was like, oh man, you know, that's who I want to be, and you know, and that was your inspiration, to say OK, I'm going to sit down behind these keys and try to put some lyrics to it, Like what's your?
Speaker 2:process like when you, when you started writing Like, would you like tinkle the keys or would you? Have a line that you would be gravitating to, like, how would your song start to surface up to the surface?
Speaker 3:yeah. So I would never really have an idea, it would always be. I would start just with like a little piano riff or something like that, or I just had a little four-track cassette recorder and then I also saved up and bought like this kind of like reverb machine I could do different stuff with and stuff like that. And then quite quickly I got into much more experimental stuff and it was like 10 second songs or you know, just screaming about something or just naming the list of people I wanted to kill and realized like I had this material.
Speaker 3:Yeah, exactly. Yeah, this needs to be released. This will be my big comeback album the killer tapes. And then, yeah, so, and it just kind of, and then it kind of was like I was sort of trapped in this small town, had no way to get out, like there was no one really artistic that I knew that could guide me or anything like that. And then quite quickly my recordings became about and it's similar sentiment that was on part of situation lives, but it was starting to become more about sort of ambition and escape and almost a fantasy life of like. And that's how I was writing these things, because I had no intention of ever letting anyone hear it. So it was more like pretending I was in a sort of a well-known American rapper.
Speaker 2:Like you, created a kind of a persona that you would sing for.
Speaker 3:Exactly.
Speaker 2:Exactly.
Speaker 3:Exactly so. It was like imagine if you know my uncle worked for, you know a record label and could get. You know, could get, could get these songs to people. I would sort of make up scenarios like that. I would just pretend that they were the best songs in the world and really it was like just 10 seconds of like reverse piano and me sort of expressing despair. Again, that sounds quite good, but if you actually listen to it, it's quite a letdown.
Speaker 2:But then you came out with like so your first you were saying your first official record in 2007, puddle City Racing Lights. That was your first kind of compilation of songs under Windmill name that you released out there to the world.
Speaker 3:Yeah, it moved fast because I didn't even have a toe in that world. It was all a fantasy. And then suddenly you know there's like press releases and like being offered big tours and getting big sync placements and stuff, like that, like it really was. Yeah, a dream become true, like very quickly, but yeah.
Speaker 2:Do you remember the reaction that that you got when the record came? That first record came out. Like what your reaction? The reaction to it was that you were getting from the world yeah, it was.
Speaker 3:Uh, it was kind of like mind-blowing and also like it was like everything you could have wished for. Like you. You couldn't believe what people were saying about it because it was my record and I saw all the faults in it and I worried it wasn't as good as the demos and, like a lot of the vocals, I felt like I tried to recreate them instead of just singing them like fresh, like which I always loved doing, and I was really worried about it. But yeah, honestly, it really couldn't have gone better and people, people were saying how much it meant to them and things like that and um, it was weird, like and actually sort of sort of hard to accept. You know it's um, yeah, yeah didn't really feel like it does happen sometimes right like it's it's.
Speaker 2:You don't almost have time to to let it register that and you just get caught up in this wave of of you know, I guess, excitement number one, I hope in um anticipation and um what? How did you gather all those songs together? Like there are two bonus tracks? Uh, racing and shutters. Yeah, how did you assemble these? This first record, um, in 2007?
Speaker 3:Yeah, so most of them were done. The only one that was written specifically was Shutters for the Japanese. They wanted an exclusive track for Japan because it was coming out on Beat Inc in Japan, which is a really great record label in Japan, so they wanted an exclusive track.
Speaker 3:I think I wrote that in you know 10 minutes like uh it's like it's probably the only time in my life that, uh, musically that I sort of like was riding a wave of confidence. I wasn't second guessing myself. And then you know you write a subpar song called shutters. So you're actually better to have, you're better to have the low self-confidence if you're questioning. But racing was um. That was the seven inch single that static, static caravan released, but a demo version. So we did re-record it and then everybody felt it didn't sit on the album as well as the other songs. So that just became I think that was a us bonus track yeah, that's right.
Speaker 2:Yeah, yeah, and shutters was a japanese bonus track and yeah, like, when you look back on that record, what? What are the songs that still mean something to you and that you you can re-listen to, because I know like, once you've gone through that cycle, it's kind of like yeah, thanks, I won't, I don't need to listen anymore. Like it's you get so inundated by it. But what are the songs, looking back over all these years, that you're like man, that was a fucking great tune. I wrote like what are?
Speaker 3:some of those songs off of that you, you have I don't know, I don't think I'd go that far to say you know it's not good, but uh, I don't know.
Speaker 3:I mean, you know, tokyo moon kept a roof over my head sometimes because they kept putting it in adverts, but that's not a reason to love it. Um, uh, what song I think replaced me, probably, and it was pretty good and uh, boarding lounges was kind of like. That was kind of the exact thing I was trying to convey, like that sense of ambition, even though when I wrote that song it was like a fantasy ambition because I hadn't really been anywhere. But the idea of, like you know, departure lounge and billboards, all this stuff really appealed to me because it was like the exact opposite of the town I was growing up in. So that song, yeah, I think, yeah, maybe boarding lounges, actually it just felt like. The song felt like you were going somewhere and it was the beginning of something and that's.
Speaker 2:You know, that's kind of what that album was for me in my life you know it's interesting you saying that too, matt that it was kind of this persona and this detachment from you, because it does feel like from your cover and some of the lyrics of you get this idea of displacement and kind of loneliness a bit, but in this kind of futuristic, so it had this distance that it wasn't quite you but is you. I just found that, like when you mentioned that, really interesting, that it was kind of through a lens of something that was a little bit less removed, is that?
Speaker 2:was that like a protective thing, so that you weren't putting your heart on your sleeve and saying, no, this, you know, like having that distance where it wasn't so close to you, and that you could kind of just be like, yeah, that's my persona of what I play.
Speaker 3:Yeah, possibly, and also I've always just had like a love of within art, just not saying things exactly as they are, like to try and use kind of a web of poetry just to kind of paint a picture, so it ends up being more like I don't really think of it as songs really. I like to think they're more as like don't just like listening to a memory or looking at a photograph. You know, I just want to give hints of things without saying exactly what it's about, even though because you don't know when you're recording these things as well Like, sometimes the best stuff is just without an idea and you just you just make sure you're just operating from the subconscious. And that's sometimes frightening because you think, oh, I've made something, but did I do it intentionally? Does that mean, does that devalue it, the fact that I haven't intended to make this thing? But the subconscious, I think, is really where that stuff comes from.
Speaker 3:And quite often when you record something just purely subconscious, even if you're doubting the fact that it has no real intention, like it is cohesive at the end and you realize what it's about on reflection and it's probably the only thing that keeps me doing it is the fact that it's like. It's a bit like, like you mentioned, my blog. It's just like, um, it's just a record of, like, what I'm going through. I mean, that's really the only value I have in doing it anymore.
Speaker 2:Yeah yeah, yeah, I love that idea of archiving um experiences. I mean, who knows who's going to read it in the end? It might just be Exactly. You know, earmarking time for who knows, but.
Speaker 3:Maybe my parents will listen to it one day, who knows, that's it. That's it. I haven't got long left.
Speaker 2:And Matt, when you moved on to the second one. So you had gotten such a good response from that first, what was your, what was your vision with the next record that came out, which was I have here ebscott, ebscott, starfields, again very futuristic looking, very um, you know it has that kind of distance and similar themes that came in in the first record. Did you feel like you had to like dramatically change everything or change your process or like what was it from that first record and getting the attention it got going into that second um record?
Speaker 3:yeah, I definitely didn't just want to make another part of city racing lights. I also, um, as much as I really appreciated like recording in the studio and stuff like that, like I did have a dissatisfaction with the process and also just how it sounded. But but I am my own worst enemy in a sense, because everyone really likes that record, like, and they would, and they and that record did much better than if we just released the demos, because they're quite rough. But I really missed that kind of rough feel and I wanted to put it back in, which is probably a big mistake. So I kind of said I want to do like half of it at home and finish the rest of it in the studio. So the label sort of bought me a MacBook and stuff like that and I had no idea what I was doing with it at all. So I had, like these bare bones of this album ended up in the studio and we just about saved it. But the concept I think it was the first time because Puddle City Racing Lights wasn't written as an album I thought, oh, here's a chance to actually write an album and I just liked that idea and that challenge. There was a bunch of songs I had. That probably would have been the second album. I released the demos on a collection called Converse Chasing Neon, so that might have been the second album.
Speaker 3:But then I just had this idea of like the Epcot Center being this kind of symbol of like a future and also like time moving on, because I've been there like with my family and stuff like that and it was kind of like I don't know. I thought it was like a good kind of metaphor for time passing, because Epcot's focused on the future and this sort of idyllic kind of experimental city, but also, you know, you go there when you're a kid and um, so it's really. Yeah, it was really about time passing and sort of facing mortality. But in the framework of the Epcot Center, which I just thought was kind of a novel, interesting idea, I mean I remember telling my friends they're like oh, what are you going to do now? Like you've got like a good record, stuff like that, like you've got the world at your feet, and I was like I'm going to write an album about the Epcot center.
Speaker 1:And they were just like you, fucking idiot.
Speaker 3:That's a terrible idea Don't do that.
Speaker 1:But you did it yeah exactly, nice, exactly.
Speaker 2:And what were the first couple of songs that came through like that, that started to solidify this record?
Speaker 3:that okay, I'm starting to get the idea of how this is gonna. I'm gonna assemble this record. Yeah, I'm quite good at like visualizing what the album should be, so I had quite a clear image of what it would be. So I really was kind of writing the songs in sequence, when, when, when, when we were putting part of this together like I really wanted boarding lounges to be the first track and the label did say no, like we don't think it should be the first one, like let's put tokyo moon, like no one knows who you are, no one's heard it. Let's put tokyo moon, like get them hooked with that, you know, big kind of positive song and then lead them in.
Speaker 3:So I sort of felt like I'd made that concession then. So it was time to. So I really wanted to have a really sparse opener. I just had the image of floating in space before you're born onto the planet and then you have to leave the planet and these are all themes and I really wanted to do that album as a journey. It started off where it kind of got worse as it went on, and so, and it started off where I kind of got worse as it went on, but yeah, Was the reaction when you put Epcot Starfield out?
Speaker 2:was it similar to the first record or was it different?
Speaker 3:Some people really loved it and I don't think it didn't get the attention that the first one got. But I mean, even, like quite recently, I've heard people say I didn't even realize attention that the first one got. But I mean I've, I mean even, like you know, quite recently I've heard people say I didn't even realize you had a second album which is, you know, I don't know who's failing, that is maybe that's mine, but yeah it's so it's it's lesser known, but but I think that's my entire music career.
Speaker 3:Like, each release is slightly less.
Speaker 2:Well, there's always a couple of years between those, well, those your record releases uh, 2007, 2009, 2013, um, and then you said at the start of this that you kind of like washed your hands of it. We're like, okay, I, I'm gonna stop doing this. Like what were? What was your thinking behind that of of saying, okay, I, I, I just can't do it anymore? Like what, what was driving you to that decision?
Speaker 3:well, like the sort of promotion and tour and stuff with the second album definitely didn't feel like the first one. It's like there's definitely like less people that want to talk to you and like less I know, there's like less buzz about it and stuff like that. Because you see, although it was going okay, but you can sort of feel internally that like this thing is dying and you've sort of like you've been waiting your whole life for this identity and you finally get it and you just say, oh, you know it's gone already, like it's dying, like what can you do? So then I, I don't know, I wanted to follow up, like I still like, had like, and then I wrote this bunch of songs that went on the third album. I really wasn't sure what they were. I didn't know if they were demos or that was the album and stuff like that. Right, and then, but I mean, I already knew it was dead, but then I sent that to label and they're like we don't like any of the songs like at all, which I thought was pretty harsh, because I think there's some decent songs on there yeah and then um, I just kind of like and
Speaker 3:then I made like I kind of like, yeah, it's a weird time, because I've I had no direction. I've sort of lost this identity that I built from nothing, like quickly. Because when you, like, when you grow up, as I did, like the fantasy about having you know a cool career and like have people listen to your art and stuff like that, I mean it's such a fantasy that when it actually happens, you think, oh, you feel such relief. You're like, oh, you know, there was something for me, like this is fantastic, like I didn't have to worry. And then it dies and you're like, oh no, this is a twist. I wasn't ready for a twist, I wanted a straightforward success story.
Speaker 2:This is, like you know, rags to riches and back to rags, something they make movies out of, exactly, exactly, yeah, maybe.
Speaker 3:I need to finish on success and not hang myself or anything like that. Right, right, right. So that was rejected and then I ended up making another album under a different name called outer albert, which um was like. It like um was very kind of a bit more mellow and sheepish because I sort of lost my confidence. So I was like so really buried all the vocals, which is quite interesting because, um, I'd sort of gone within myself a little bit and then obviously no one listened to that. And then um, and then it was a couple of years off. Really it was just like.
Speaker 3:But the ironic thing was like at that period is when sort of women started getting like lots of sync placements and stuff like that. So financially, like windmill was doing better than ever, but the like career was kind of dead as well. So it was all like these missed times, like when I was making the first album, I had nowhere to really live, like I was just staying on sofas in friends' houses. It was quite a difficult time. This was the flip side. I had none of the success. But suddenly I was doing well in other ways as well. I was trying to record stuff and I would just keep giving up halfway.
Speaker 2:What was it like? It just didn't feel like you. It didn't feel like how you would write songs typically, or like what was it that just kept falling at the at the computer yeah, like I just felt in the back of my mind that like, okay, oh, it was just a fantasy.
Speaker 3:Like this thing just came and went and died, like, and as much as you're doing it for yourself, you're like you can't go from a bunch of people really caring about it and saying how much it meant to them to suddenly nothing, like it's. It's quite like. The motivation was just like, oh, no, like, and it just felt like fate telling me it was the end. You know, not for my life, for making songs, like I just felt like as good as the other stuff had gone. It just felt like, oh, no, I sort of had I did have a bit of a confidence loss, so I would get halfway through a song, just like. You know what am I doing?
Speaker 3:Like you, know, I need to get serious about something else.
Speaker 2:And how did you get through that? Because you you've been releasing singles now for, you know, the last couple of years. Now you've kind of resurfaced and started like how, where did that research come from?
Speaker 3:I'm on your podcast. This is uh, this is the, this is the resurface. Nice, you're witnessing it firsthand amazing.
Speaker 3:Well, I, I I mean, we left um, me and my girlfriend were living in london. We'd lived there a long time and, um, it just felt like the end of something. So we were like we were both working remotely and we were just like, let's just leave, um. So we just like packed up our flat and we um put all of our stuff in my girlfriend's parents. We told them we'd only be away a month, so their house was full of this stuff and we were away for 18 months and we were living in like all these different cities all across Europe and I bought like a little camera and it was like I don't know, it's just like this new, like creative resurgence, and it was like actually, all the things that I'd been singing about on Puddle City, like getting away, and like I was now doing it like, even though it wasn't through music, um.
Speaker 3:So, yeah, we traveled and then, like, after like over a year, and just suddenly I just thought you know, I don't feel myself not making stuff, not making recordings, like something in me is actually missing and it actually took me a little while to realize that I don't really need permission to do that, like just because it's not successful and anyone's listening. I went through a period where it felt like, okay, I've been rejected, I'm not allowed to do this anymore, when actually I realized it's completely up to me, sure, so we came back realization to come to it.
Speaker 3:Yeah, just like the freeingness of that it was quite freeing and also to strip all of that stuff away like and like um you know reviews and radio, play all that stuff and then still realize you still have a need to do it. It's quite nice, and actually you probably come up with more interesting stuff as well that way right right and have you found?
Speaker 2:have you found that it's that that your songwriting has evolved since that, since that pause, and then kind of it resurfacing again, like how do you feel that your style has changed, how, or your process of writing?
Speaker 3:I mean I feel so free and the fact that no one's listening to it. I can say whatever I like. I can talk about problems, financial problems, I can just come up. Yeah, it feels so good Like my whole life. My dream was to like have a acoustic piano. Like it was like I'd never had one, never could afford it. And then when we moved to this town and like I finally got an acoustic piano, so that was like another catalyst. I've been working really hard at trying to become like a better classical pianist. I'm trying to integrate that stuff like the piano form, into my songs. I think that's quite interesting and yeah, it does feel like a resurgence and yeah, I'm really enjoying recording at the moment. Like I feel I've really felt like myself again.
Speaker 2:Yeah, yeah. Well, I've listened to the singles that you've put out on Bandcamp and they're really great. I love too that you do a single, you do an instrumental, sometimes you do a slower version or another demo version or whatever, so you kind of really get to see your progress of that song or the thoughts that have gone into it. It's I love that idea. I've never seen an artist do that before, where they put a single but it's four, four songs.
Speaker 3:you know slightly different I really love that idea, thank you, yeah, I mean, who knows, maybe I'll find the energy to do a collection or something at some point, but I've been just enjoying like week by week, week just like. Sometimes the songs take a day and sometimes they take a couple of weeks and, um, yeah, I just kind of yeah, I found the love of it again, I think, which had sort of disappeared for a while, and who knows how long it will last. But I'm not too worried about it anymore, I just uh, yeah that's cool, that's amazing reflection.
Speaker 2:Uh, I just I love that you're sharing these reflections of, like these realizations, because I'm sure most, if not many or all musicians go through similar experiences, struggles, you know, of questioning, yeah, what am I doing this for? And and then coming to the realization that I'm not doing it for. I mean, it's great if other one people want to enjoy it, but I need to do it.
Speaker 3:It's something that you know actually is a part of who I am, unless that's where the good stuff comes from, especially like the kind of the music we're in tea like it has to be real, it has to represent real suffering. I think like I don't think I anymore. I'm not even trying to make good songs, I'm just trying to make something that satisfies me or I find interesting, because, yeah, I don't owe anyone anything no, but please keep sharing it with the world.
Speaker 2:Um, oh, thank you, because I think that there are people out there that really connect and I'll put my hand up for sure that I really connect with your music and your delivery. I mean, it's a very unique. Your voice is amazing and the power it has, but it's a very in um unique as well. Um, your delivery I wanted to just ask you too is like how did you get your voice? Like, how did you find that high end? Um and and being able to manipulate it the way that you do?
Speaker 3:yeah, I think so, yeah, just like the same way I was experimenting, like with the, the machines and tape and making things go in reverse and things like that, like I just always like making weird sounds with my voice, to the point where and even have it when I speak a bit as well, like I don't really know how to speak, completely naturally, like there's always conscious thought behind how I'm pronouncing everything, and I have that.
Speaker 3:You know, when I'm recording and I just like, I think of it, like I don't even think of it as singing with you. I try to think of it as like, sort of like a, it's like vocal sculpture, it's just kind of like, you know, molding it, changing it, and that's why it's, that's why the studio album is quite difficult as well, because, um, again you're trying to recreate something that already is, whereas I really, I really love, like, because quite often when I'm recording a song, I'll be writing it at the same time. So quite often the first time I sing, something will be that will be the take. So it's as I've invented the line, it's been captured, and I really I think that gives it for me. From my perspective, it gives it, it gives it a certain quality that probably only I can see, because people haven't heard the other variant variations of it. But yeah, I really like capturing it as you feel it Like that's.
Speaker 2:That's my favorite, my favorite thing yeah, I know I get that sense too of listening to your songs, that it's like you're on this wave and you're just going for it. It's like it's hard to like. Okay, stop, all right, we're gonna do that again yeah, I don't know if I can.
Speaker 3:I don't know if I'm capable yeah yeah, uh, yeah, I don't know, uh, it's. I don't know how people do that, it's so genuine and you put your your soul into it.
Speaker 2:It's, it's. It's not a like okay, retake over. You know it's just like it doesn't fit into that mold. It has to just be like there it is.
Speaker 3:Yeah, perfect, yeah yeah, and and even if it sounds like wrong, like sometimes that's what I like, like I really like wayward sounding stuff, like I like it to sound a bit broken because, like you're conveying something that's a bit broken within you a lot of the time.
Speaker 2:So yeah, so, matt, what do we again? Thanks for joining me today.
Speaker 1:This has been very cathartic for me.
Speaker 2:You really have some good reflections that I think a lot of artists out there and have as well, and just having your um weight behind it and your experience is just like it's really awesome um thank you, but I'd love to know. Like what's what? Where do you see yourself going with windmill, you know, this year, into next year? Like, what are you hoping happens? Or, if you know you could paint that picture, what would it look like?
Speaker 3:I don't know. Just, you know, make good stuff. You know, like I, really I just want to make satisfying stuff. You know, I want to become a much better piano player and then integrate that into my recordings. And then, yeah, integrate that into my recordings, I'd like to do like an album. An album of like really experimental stuff like um, you know, with um, maybe not lyrics, and stuff like that, like um yeah I want to get. I want to get down and dirty in the garage and get fiddling, whatever that means.
Speaker 1:I can't wait.
Speaker 3:Oh, thank you, that's the crawling around on all fours making animal noises I told you about earlier. That's to come, yeah.
Speaker 2:So we're going to play a single at the end of this. Can you lead into it? What are we going to hear? What's the song?
Speaker 3:This song is called Amygdala and it's a song about my brain, but also I think of it as a romantic song because it's about someone that supports you even though you have a dodgy brain. So, uh, yeah, I think this this. I actually wrote this song when I was thinking of making a new women album and I did about five songs. This was like this was going to be, you know, an album opener, which, um so, but um, now it's probably not. But, uh, enjoy it for its own credits, whatever that that doesn't make any sense. Enjoy it for what it is is what I'm going to say yeah, well, I want to thank you again.
Speaker 2:it's been a real treat and, um, I wish you all the best with your music and I'm glad that you've come to that realization that it music is, is a part of you, um, and you can't escape it. Keep throwing it out there too, because you do have fans out there. Ok, thank you, and we'll leave it at that and we'll let you sing us out.
Speaker 3:I've been waiting 12 years to hear that. Can you imagine how good that feels for me?
Speaker 2:That's a long time coming. It's a long time coming, but you've been consistent and you haven't folded it in and said, okay, I'm done, I'm tapped out, it's still in you. So I mean, I think just that those words are inspiring for all starting up artists, that it's never over.
Speaker 3:Thank you so much. Much thanks for having me thanks so much take care cheers cheers.
Speaker 1:So, thank you, I'm being this attitude. Don't go out. No one trusts me. I'm not impressed With some of the stuff I want, so you take me out. I can't compete. I can't compete. Take me where there's no room. No one can understand me. Take me where there's no room. No one has no room. Thank you, go up. Go up To the top, to the bottom, to the top to the bottom, to the top, to the bottom. As a breath for me To assimilate, concepts of the dead are, and the bottom ones Are groups of people. I see you're expecting, but I can't turn the nerves If anyone can do just that. Can you just watch one more? Can you just watch one more? I'm going westward, I'm going westward, I'm going westward, I'm going westward, I'm going westward. I'm sorry. See you next time. I love you.
